Lord of the Rings needed more Suey hobbits, sugary love interests and COMETS OF DEATH


So this is basically Lord of the Rings, Dennis McKiernan style. Unfortunately, copying various things that were in the book doesn't make your book even nearly as good - the hero is wimpy, the action is strange, the moral messages make you want to stick a fork in your head, and the poetry is horrendous. Admittedly this was some of McKiernan's earliest work, but come on.

NOTE: these chapters are ridiculously long, so I'm splitting them into three parts apiece.

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